The Empire Strikes Back

Just when you would think Contracts Professor and I were in slacker equilibrium, that I had won the battle of wits: The Empire Struck Back.

::cue the Empire Strikes Back music::

Most people don’t like being called in class. But it happens to everyone; on occasion someone may even get called on twice in a big class. But, three times is just plain ridiculous. Seriously, who gets called on three times in class? He clearly has a grudge against anyone he calls on three times. Being called on three times is just not right. Well if you think that he called on me three times in class you would be wrong, he called on me four.

“Mr. Slacker, you have been awfully quiet lately, why don’t you explain x aspect of ABC case.”

Ordinarily this would not be a problem, but case ABC is a blurb mini-case that we had read a month ago. If it was a full size case, I could have pulled up an old brief, but since it was a small mini-case, I had nothing written down. This case was not on the reading list for today’s class. By all rational standards we would not be held responsible for this case today.

Like a rational human being, I kindly explained the predicament that I was in and suggested that he cue me in on certain facts, or to call on me later after I had read over the case. He took insult to the first suggestion and decided to ream me with the second.

One person later he called on me. The minute between the first and second time he called on me was not enough time to read the case. This was kind of ridiculous, but I had read enough to get the gist. I agreed with the person before me even though Contracts Professor kind of implied that the answer was wrong. I had not yet found anything in the text to suggest why Contracts Professor was right and the other student was wrong and didn’t want to invite on anymore pain. He made some quip and then moved on to some others.

He then started on case DEF. I had read DEF and knew it well. I raised my hand, implementing my aforementioned strategy of becoming Mr. Question Guy to avoid being called on. There was a half an hour left in class and I am fairly certain that he intended to spend almost all of that on this case.

He called on me and implied that this ought to be good.

“I figured I should try to redeem myself” I jokingly quipped back. The class found this funny.

I nailed the case. He fired question after question at me as if it were rounds of artillery. But I kept nailing every single point of the case. So instead of the Socratic Method taking 25 minutes of class, it took about 5 minutes of rapid fire questions to me.

Although, impressed with my intelligence, Contracts Professor was not impressed that it didn’t take almost the rest of the class. He also was not going to let me win the war of wits.

He moved on to another mini-case, this one vaguer and took far more abstraction to understand. He called on me for the fourth time on a very difficult case.

What??!? Didn’t I just nail a case proving my worthiness? Yes, but he was definitely not going to let me have the last laugh and he wasn’t a Rhodes Scholar for nothing.

I kind of skimmed the case earlier and did my best. But I had only got some of the points and was missing part of the idea. He reamed me for trying to redeem myself and outsmart him. He won.

I figured out the case after he moved on to a good chunk of other people, but before I could quip back, he said the answer.

I wish I had a happy ending to this story, but sadly it ends there. Just like the Empire Strikes Back, with the good guys losing.

But fear not, there will be a Return of the Jedi.

::cue star wars closing music::