Why I am Going to Law School

Welcome to Slacker and Slacker LLP home of great tales of slacking in Law School.

After hearing from many people that law school is a horrible life decision, the first question you should ask is: why would a slacker ever want to go to law school, face three hard years of school, and a difficult legal world after?

I am still trying to figure out the answer myself. But here is my best shot. It all started out on a weekend at the end of my junior year of college when I was visiting home. My Dad offered to take me out to ‘Olive Garden’ and I thought 'Sweet, good Italian food, what a fun dinner this will be'. I was wrong.

During dinner sometime my Dad asked me 'So what's it going to be Business, Law, or Medicine?’ After briefly entertaining the idea of getting a PhD in philosophy (running around cold and hungry on the street rambling incoherently about Nietzsche and Kant did not sound appealing) I told my dad that I was not interested in going into the business world, like him, and I don't like blood. The next day my Dad enrolled me in an LSAT class.

I figured I am passionate about philosophy and law is like philosophy in that it has a lot of arguments. So I figured this could work out. But, I really didn't think about it, too much. Like any other healthy third year in college I was too busy thinking about parties and girls. My furthest extent of being productive was useless philosophy debates at 3 in the morning, but I was certainly not worrying about the future.

Maybe I should have realized it is a sign not to go to law school after I only answered 7 questions in an LSAT section after I panicked, or the fact that the LSAC gave me the Sabbath test by accident (which has a harder curve and gives you a lower score), or the fact that I regularly scored in the low 170s on my practice tests, yet somehow scored less on the real test, but I had set my mind on going to law school and I am one stubborn kid when I set my mind to something.

Next you would think that my adventures visiting schools would deter me. But I sure am stubborn. I found myself in one of America’s finest cities that offered me a lot of scholarship money. There was this cute girl that I had stricken up a conversation with and was getting rather friendly. We were in the back of the crowded auditorium and she asked me who I was here with. I was baffled and thought this was an obvious question, but responded 'just myself'. I have never seen a girl seemed more turned on, that quickly, from such a short statement. She was twirling her hair rapidly, and her eyes look like Bambi’s, as she responded 'Oh my God, you are so mature'. Ordinarily this would be a great thing. But I was in a crowded auditorium, and my plane leaved in a couple hours for the next school. In any other venue it would have been a done deal, but being in a crowded law school auditorium ruined it. This left me frustrated

Next I found myself in another of America’s fine cities. This one is far colder, denser, with very few attractive women. This city looked like where they send all the failures of Jenny Craig. After arriving in this city and being unhappy over the events of the other girl, I decided to hit the bars. So I mistakenly had the great idea of walking 9 streets to save the money on the taxi. What a horrible idea! I began to walk when I ran into a lady begging for money on the street. I felt bad and gave her the change in my pocket. Next I heard something rather shocking. 'Sir, I want a sandwich. Can you buy me a sandwich?' I told her I did not have any more money, but she didn't buy this. She decided to follow me for 4 blocks asking me for a sandwich after I was no longer talking with her. I feel real bad for people in that situation, I really do, but I was seriously freaked out. A bum was chasing me around for a Freakin’ sandwich! I was happy when the bum left me alone, until I saw what appeared to be a body bag next to a steaming sewer. I am almost positive this was a bum sleeping, who wrapped up in a blanket, but in the event this was a dead person I decided to get a cab for the last two blocks. By this time I am somewhat traumatized, it is sad that some people have to live like this. On the Brightside I rocked the bar/club and the waitress was getting me free drinks. She said I was charming. Who am I to argue?

I didn’t ultimately decide to go to either one of those schools, but the decision between the three schools I was deciding between was difficult. After I feared that I may drive Dan and some of my other friends insane if they had to listen to me debate between the schools any longer, I made a decision. When I went to my e-mail to withdraw from the other two schools, I received an email from another school which I was on the waitlist, admitting me. This further extended the process, and seemed that the process was taunting me. I ultimately kept with my original decision.

So after this grueling process and hearing why not to go to school, why am I going? Well at the moment I don’t have any other ideas. But for fear of ending up as one of the Barely Legal: The Blog reasons not to attend law school, here is my best shot at a better one.

I find the law and its implications interesting. Although, I am sure I will have many thankless and useless billable hours in the future, dealing with legal issues interests me. If there is someway that I could further justice or improve society it will be worth it to me. I am sure most cases I will deal with, especially at the beginning, will be uninteresting. But every now and again, rarely, I will get to work on some interesting legal issues and make my small contribution in helping the legal process and improving lives. I would still rather talk about philosophy over law, but they don’t get billable hours. My head may like philosophy more, but my wallet is a fan of billable hours.